Your Emotional Mindset Matters
We all have thoughts and opinions about emotions. For example, when you think of experiencing joy - is that a “good” or “bad” emotion? What about fear? If you’re like most people, you likely judged joy as positive, and fear as negative. This is common in our society because of what stories we tell ourselves about emotions.
Emotional Stories
Do you recognize any of the following stories about emotions?
I need to keep my emotions under control, or something bad will happen.
People should keep their emotions to themselves.
If I feel negative emotions, something is wrong.
Men shouldn’t feel sad.
Women shouldn’t feel angry.
Anything stick out to you? Or maybe your beliefs are starkly different? Regardless, these stories often come as a result of our upbringing, and what the people who were important to us told us about emotions.
Perhaps you had a parent who told you to buck up, stop crying - or a grandparent who swooped to your side whenever you cried to dry the tears and try to cheer you up. Maybe your parents encouraged you to yell and scream when you were angry - or maybe they yelled and screamed when they were angry and frightened you.
Regardless of the stories you were told (or shown) about emotions, they can result in some not so helpful mindsets about emotions - anger is bad, negative emotions should be quieted, I shouldn’t express my emotions - I could go on and on.
Take a Look at Your Emotional Mindset
It can be helpful to take a step back and explore the way your emotional mindset was formed. Often, this is beneficial in seeing why you have so much difficulty with certain emotions, and how you might make some changes. Ask yourself what kinds of messages you were told, or shown, about emotions growing up. Were certain emotions desirable, or to be avoided? How were you taught to handle difficult emotions? Which emotions were expressed, or hidden away? How did the adults in your life growing up handle their emotions, or react to yours?
I encourage you to write this down, and keep it in mind as you are going through your days, and experiencing emotions. Notice when your emotional mindset is potentially hindering you. Is that mindset one you wish to keep - or not?
If you’re struggling to shake off an unhelpful emotional mindset - if you’d love to be able to experience a full range of emotions, without fear of losing control - click the “Request a Session Now” button. You deserve the time and dedication of a caring professional to help you change your mindset to exactly what you wish it to be.
